If you are new to FabulousOver60 or have been reading it for a long time, you need to know we do not believe that 60 is the new anything other than “the new 60″.
But while this is something we have gotten “right” Cathy and I often feel we are missing the mark on various minor or even major cultural trends that we don’t “get” but obviously have made it to main stream behavior and thought to be absolutely fine. Think of these examples: changing plans with one’s parents at the last minute; NOT writing a proper thank you note; NOT working for a living and taking personal responsibility to support oneself even if that income is REALLY modest; NOT getting dressed up a bit to attend someone’s graduation, wedding or school event; NOT RSVP’ing to an invitation – or worse – accepting and not showing up — and the list goes on. Common conversation among us fabulousover60s which we just keep to ourselves since we know we are no longer the protagonist of life’s story.
Well, lo and behold (remember that one?) we have had a break — and now a GIFT to give that actually we agree with and can say (if we were obnoxious enough to do so and we are not) “told you so”.
Age 20, according to popular psychologist Meg Jay, is NOT the new 30. The 20s are actually The Defining Decade.
Now everyone fabulousover60 knows a niece, nephew, grandchild, client offspring, colleague’s son or daughter that is not working, living at home or on their parent’s dime or otherwise not paying attention to what we used to think of as growing up. The most radical thing some of us did was not having children or becoming a lawyer or doctor when virtually no women were. Well perhaps that is a bit of revisionist self-serving history! Like previous generations we “forgot” our “transgressions” — like the reefer we smoked and inhaled along with that commune in 69 and Woodstock. But I digress.
From the Great Recession, to Gen Xers or young boomers and their children being “friends” rather than two different camps the way it was when we were 20 something, reasons abound for the less than fully employed and under committed.
To be fair, and, as a life coach, I certainly know making anyone feel really bad about not doing or achieving can risk their self-esteem — but we fabulous women would tend to agree most younger people have “too much” self-esteem by our standards.
Remember that our parents no matter their background, race or primary language never learned the words “what do YOU think you should do?” So we wanted to say that but NEVER did. Maybe Dr. Jay can say it for us — either by gifting 20-somethings, or their parents the physical book. Or, if they really never read paper books, send them an e-card with a talking animal saying something witty plus the link to Meg Jay’s TED Talk. Good advice seems to be coming back in style — and just in time for the holiday giving season. That’s at least one or two people you can gift with confidence.